Monday, November 19, 2018

Everything takes speed. My life is becoming faster and I am scared of traveling in high speed.

The fear of spending whole life over few days worries me. Those few days don't mean only a specific days. But it indicates the whole lifetime. The duration of a life is long enough. But this long duration seems very short when someone lives in week or month. If someone feel every moment of life, he/she will live it more than expected one. For this, it is needed to stop for a while and feel everything.

Sunday, October 28, 2018 (Goals and Objectives)

There was a racer who aimed at finishing his race with proper paperwork and planning. There were several objectives to reach in his goal. He recognized that he had completed an objective (a certain distance) in a wrong racing truck. But he pretended that he was in right truck and again planned to reach the next level with new racing truck. He drove fast and achieved the next objective where he again recognized it a wrong and completely new truck. Though it was a wrong truck, he again pretended to be a right truck. The event happened again and again and every time he pretended to be right. After reaching the finishing line, the racer knew that the achievement was unexpected and undesirable but still it was an achievement. So, he tried to make objectives to prove that his achievement was expected and desirable. For this, he worked whole day to make a perfect story. And he had done his job well. But he understood that the day is over and he was busy only to convert a wrong thing into a right thing. He was neither happy nor celebrated his victory.

There are few ultimate goals that almost everyone sets to achieve in the lifetime.

People set their goals and complete objectives to accomplish the goals. After then we achieve their goals. That process is normal and generally people achieve their goals by doing so.

In my case, I take time to set goals. After setting my goals, I am engaged to accomplish objectives one by one. Just before the finishing line, I find out that the racing track is changed but I still achieve a goal which is undesirable and unwanted for me. I try to adjust evreveryth according to the requirements of unwanted goal. I create Objectives and accomplish them to fill up the gaps between plan and goal.

But life is not very small. It is larger than our expectation. Holding wrong thing as pretending right thing will not be the best option in that large life for sure.

Thursday, October 11, 2018 (visible)

Everything is becoming so close that the invisible matters are also visible now. The escape velocity is achieved to overcome the gravititional force of the star. And it's time to travel interstellar space and it will be the darkest place for sure. There will be a long way to go to reach the next star. The way may be totally dark, maybe a deep black ocean. But this deep black ocean seems better than to remain in the gravititional force of the star.

Sometimes it is better to leave rather than to remain. The next path will be the toughest to conquer but loosing without any attempt arises questions. These questions will remain unanswered and only assumption will be made.

Sunday, September 30, 2018 (Reality and Imagination)

What is the reality???

The question is very odd because we know the simple answer of it. The reality is the existing things that we see or feel or are happening in the world. So, it is the actual thing that happens. But accepting reality closes the door of opportunities. There are many angles of a thing. The result of a situation maybe different if we do something else. 

When there is an output in front of me, I start thinking about the different possible situations. The different possible situations that may occur in case of any change in input.

Reality is nothing but a barrier to overcome. Accepting the existing situation maybe the easiest bet and challenging the existing situation is the hardest bet. Following easiest path araises some questions of "what if" that we will ask ourselves in our entire life. But the question will remain unanswered for sure. On the other hand, playing the hardest bet may be difficult but we will get the answer of "what if". Imagination can not be converted into the reality if we simply accept the existing situation. Sometimes, challenging reality enables us to avoid asking questions of "what if" ourselves. 

I love turns and twists. Life becomes more attractive when there are many turns and twists. Almost everyone plays the safest bet. There are some idiots who love to play the risky bet.

The conclusion is that challenging reality is better than asking an unanswerable question forever. 

Tuesday, September 25, 2018

Sometimes, confidence of other on me makes me nervous. Nervousness is that I may not be able to live up the person's confidence. There are many reasons behind it. Other's confidence on me and their love for me are like a barden for me. It is the major reason behind my nervousness. Similarly when there is an expectation, I get nervous. Because an expectation has a minimum requirement that must be fulfilled.

Monday, September 17, 2018 (getting inspired rather than becoming depressed)

It is human behavior to become depressed due to the success of others. Success of someone does not matter for others. Because it neither takes away anything from you nor gives you something. There is nothing that will make a difference.

For me, other's success is an inspiration. It inspires me to study their success and figure out secrets behind their success. Success may be ethical or unethical. It doesn't matter for most of the people but I never prefer unethical means.

Similar there are many things to know about an unsuccessful attempt because it teaches us to alert about some unexpected results.

All in all, I am totally inspired by the great success of an elder brother. His success inspires me to be goal oriented. 

Wednessday, August 22, 2018 (Eid Ul Azhar)

It has been a long time now. But still I always recognize it new. When an event happened, it is frizzed in time frame forever. Similarly when a person left the world, he is caught in our mind.  I never miss someone like this in my life time. Basically life changes with every event but some events stops our life to move on. I am just caught on a frame and I don’t want to move on. Untold words are burden which is hard to hold when you know that those will remain untold forever.  

Thursday, August 09, 2018 (Purchasing new mobile)

I have bought a new mobile and that is Xioami Redmi Note 5 AI. After analyzing a month, I made up my mind to buy it. So, it is 7th phone in my life. The last one was HTC Desire 10 Pro that was robbed in few months back. 

Monday, July 30, 2018 (A realization after losing shadow)

Remaining silent does not mean that I don’t have any feeling at all. But remaining silent stores pain in every moment. After a while those pain make a hill of pain and those pains make a mountain after a few years.  The silent persons suffer more than the expressive persons because an expressive person can reduce his pain by sharing or telling about his pain to others. On the other hand, silent persons don’t share or express their pain and it increases day by day. I am a reserved person. Today is the first year of losing my shadow. The shadow followed me even though there was no light. I don’t know why I think about that shadow all the time. Maybe some things have not been told to that shadow. When the shadow went away from me forever, I realized about untold sayings. Every person has some words to say to some specific persons. Though I did not have a friendly relationship with my father, I miss him always. Every day, every hour, whenever I get time to think, I miss him. 

Wednesday, July 18, 2018 (Effort and Expectation)

There are many quotations that we hear or see in various places. Whenever I see a useful quotation, I try to follow it. Because it gives motivation, inspiration and a new way of life. I heard a quotation from my HRM teacher, Abu Nur Isa, that was “work more and expect less”. I follow it as I expect much lower than my input. In Fact, I often don’t care about result and greatly focus on the task assigned for me. I always psychologically prepare to accept any low result in my side. Because I believe that I deserve the lowest one. But Allah always gives me a better thing. Maybe someone’s prayer is with me. For me, winning a big battle is not important but winning many small battles is a matter. And I am actually happy to get an unexpected better thing.

Small steps are safer than long steps in long run

Monday, July 16, 2018 (End of FIFA world Cup-18)

So, France has won the world cup 2018. I did not expect it but everything is unpredictable in case of sports. Sometimes, underdog can be the winner. Time is passing very fast.


In 2002, I was in Primary School and that was only real when I saw Brazil winning the world cup. In 2006, I was in High School. In 2010, I was in College and I was in University in 2014. Now, I am a jobholder. I see every world cup as a new persons.

Friday, July 06, 2018

We become happy when there is someone to love and care you because we need someone to care us, to love us, to understand us. People always want them to stay near by persons who love, care and understand them. And there is nothing wrong on their want. 

My communication skill is very poor. I never try to influence anyone to care or love me. But still there are few persons who care me. Maybe they find something in me that they like. Whenever I find someone who care, love and understand me, I try to stay away from them. For this behavior, maybe people consider me as a lunatic person. Their assumption is not wrong because a lunatic person does an activity without any reason for his own loss. But I have reason to do such acts. When someone likes me, loves me, cares me, I feel that I don’t deserve that love or care. I feel that they give me something excess. I know I can't give back such love and care to them. Their love is a burden for me and it will increase over the time. So, I try to stay away from them. But such acts make them feel that I ignore their love and care which is not true. I just feel that I don’t deserve their love. That’s all.